Ups and Downs

The past week held many ups and downs for me.  It started with an invigorating Sunday morning at church where I had fun with the 2nd grade Sunday School class and then attended an energizing worship service.  During the service, the verse Romans 12:12 was read a couple of times, and it really stuck with me.

~ Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, and constant in Prayer.~

The prior week had been very busy, and I already felt a tinge of congestion in my head, so I knew that keeping focused on God was going to be very important in the week ahead.  So, I made the commitment that I'd use that verse as my mantra that week.  I committed it to memory and repeated it frequently throughout the week.  So, how did I do with living it out?

Well, as the day wore on, it became painfully clear I'd come down with a cold.   I did pray constantly that God would heal my cold, but I didn't do anything to help my body fight off the cold.  I worked a ton, ate poorly, ran around like normal in the evenings, and didn't go to bed any earlier than normal.  So, the cold persisted and has now turned into a sinus infection.  It's just a reminder that

As I started the work week on Monday, I knew I had a busy week ahead.  Little did I know that on top of the expected activities even more unexpected tasks would come up, and by Wednesday night I would be completely exhausted.    I tried to be patient, knowing that the stress would end once the tasks were completed.  As hard as I tried, being patient did nothing to reduce my stress.

On Thursday, I spent the day with my daughter and her classmates on their field trip to the Missouri Capital in Jefferson City.  As I went to bed Wednesday night, all I could think was how terrible the timing was for the trip.  I had too much going on at work.  I was still recovering from the pesky cold.  I hadn't done much of anything around the house all week, including buy milk.  I won't say that I didn't think about work, the empty fridge, or my congested head at all while we were in Jeff City that day, but I did have a fantastic time with my daughter and her friends.

So, at the end of the week, how well did I do at living out Romans 12:12?  Well, I'm giving my performance a mixed review.  Here's why.

I prayed a lot.  Did I pray constantly?  No.  Did I pray multiple times throughout the day?  Yes.  Did I pray first thing when I work up and before I went to sleep each night?  I most definitely did. Did the constant prayer keep me focused on God?  Well, sort of.  I was focused on asking God to help me with all of the things that weren't going the way I wanted them to.  If I am honest though, I'd say at least 75% of my prayers last week were some sort of petition.  That leaves only 25% for praise, confession and thanksgiving.  Not so great.

Now, let's talk about patience.  Was I afflicted?  Of course.  Did I turn to God and pray for deliverance in the struggles?  Absolutely! Was I being patient?  I definitely tried to be patient.  How did I try to be patient?  I told myself (in my head of course) to be patient.  I reminded myself that the light would come at the end of the tunnel.  I read Psalms that talk about deliverance and God's justice.  Did I persevere?  Well, sort of.  I mean, if you being completely stressed out and crabby persevering, then I guess you could say I did.  So, if I tried to be patient, then why didn't I persevere with more grace?  That's the question I found myself asking at the end of the week.  I found the answer in the third part (well, really the first part) of the verse.

That brings me to being "joyful in hope."  Was I joyful?  When the week was over and it was 5 pm on Friday I was.  Did I have hope that God would hear my prayers for assistance?  Well, I kept praying.  So, if I had hope, then why was it so hard to be joyful?  Because I was short-sighted.  I was totally missing the point.  I was living for today and wasn't living in light of eternity.

You see, I was focusing so much on my current struggles that I lost sight of the bigger picture.  My hope was only for the present, and the present sucked.  So, how could I be joyful in that? 

The point is that the hope God gives us extends beyond this moment, this lifetime, and even this world.  It isn't hope that life will be easy; it's hope for another life with him for eternity. It's hope that our loved ones will be there with us.   It's hope that with the life he's given us now, we'll bring him glory and spread his love to the world around us.  It's hope that each day I'm here I am doing my part in his eternal plan.  When I think about hope that way, it's hard to not be joyful.

So, as I go into this new week, I feel refreshed and energized, and it's not just because of the antibiotics that are getting rid of the nasty infection in my head.  It's because I now understand what Paul meant by Romans 12:12. First and foremost, I will put in my heart and mind the hope that God gives us through his son Jesus Christ. As the tribulations arise (and we all know they will), I will have patience because my heart is dwelling not on the affliction, but on the joy resulting from the hope that is in me.  And, I will pray.  Not because I want to receive something, but because there is no better way to express the joy, hope, and adoration that I have for my God and savior.