Kindergarten Day 2

Sometimes the biggest lies aren't false facts; instead, they are really omissions.  That is what we found out on Audrey's second day of kindergarten.  When I went to get her, the teacher in the after-school program told me Audrey's teacher wanted to talk to me.  Part of me wanted to think it was to tell me how great Audrey was doing, but I couldn't fight the sinking feeling in my stomach.  She told me that Audrey had been having a tough time.  Ok, so what does that mean?  She has been refusing to listen, telling the teacher no, and throwing fits instead of following directions.  Boom...it was like a blow to the stomach.  I was shocked.  I mean, Audrey does those things from time to time at home, but it is rare.  It is usually when she's tired and under a lot of stress.  Oh, wait, that makes sense.  It's the first week of kindergarten.  Audrey hasn't been taking naps, and she is in a completely new place with people and routines she isn't familiar with.  She's tired and stressed.  Duh!

That night, she went to bed as soon as we ate and she got a bath.  She was still a bit groggy when her brother woke her up the next morning, but her day at school was better.  Today , I just assumed it would continue to get better, because that is what happens.  Right?  Wrong!  I got a voicemail around 2:30 from the administrative intern in the principal's office to tell me there had been an incident with Audrey this morning.  I went to pick her up early and talked to both that intern and Audrey's teacher to figure out what exactly an "incident" entails.  She had refused to listen, and then when she was not included in an activity because of it, she had a complete meltdown.  We're talking full-on temper tantrum with kicking, screaming, hitting and getting sent to the office for almost an hour.   So, she was in bed by 6:30 tonight.  We also set some ground rules for the consequences she can expect at home for both good and bad behavior at school.

I do realize I am putting this in writing and that Audrey will see this when she gets older.  It's part of her story though, and I am sure she'll learn from it. We are blessed that she goes to a school where her teacher and the office staff care enough to call us and meet with us and work with us to help her get through this transition.  I know that she'll get through this. She is a good kid and is just making some poor choices right now.  I also know that some day I'll laugh about it.  Right now though, we'll keep praying, keep working with her teacher, and do everything we can to make sure she gets enough sleep!

First Day

It's official.  I am the mother of an elementary school aged child. Despite how that makes me feel, the kids are doing great.  For all of the build up, the past two days have gone off very well.  Yesterday, we arrived at Barrett's school just as they were serving breakfast.  I pulled a chair out for Barrett, he sat down, and started eating.  I walked out without any resistance from him.  It was a near miracle.

After dropping him off, Audrey and I had a girl's day.  It primarily ended up with running errands, but I guess that is what my mom and I always do on girl's days...shop!  One of those errands included buying some tennis shoes for Audrey, because she needs them for PE class.  She is so excited about them that she wanted to wear them today, and plans to wear them again tomorrow when she actually has PE.  Oh, did I mention that they are bright pink. 

So, this morning, after I woke up late and scrambled to get ready and make breakfast, Audrey woke up as excited as I've ever seen her.  She was in a very good mood and couldn't wait to get to school.  As such, the drop off went great.  There was another boy from her class that had just gotten dropped off too, so she was set.  She went to hang up her backpack, waved goodbye, and she was officially a kindergartener.

I left work a little early so I could pick her up before she'd been at after school care too long (because I know there will be many nights when I can't).  She was listening intently to the instructor and didn't even notice me come in.  As soon as we walked out, she started telling me stories about the day.   Here are some of my favorites.

• They established class rules, and her contribution was to "Be respectful and listen to the teacher."
• When we ask about friends, the first person she always mentions is Robbie.  She says they already knew each other from church, but I am already a little suspicious because of how fond she is of talking about him.
• They went to music class today.  They read the book and sang the song of Miss Mary Mack.  All evening she's been repeating, "Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack.  All dressed in black, black, black" over and over again.
• The only got a short time for resting.  Audrey said she did fall asleep, but it wasn't very long, because she barely slept for a second when they woke her up.  As such, she is pretty tired tonight.
• Audrey got two snacks today.  I think one was in her class and one was in after school Adventure Club.  She keeps talking about it because she is so excited to have gotten two snacks.

I always knew she's do fine, but I am still impressed by how well she did with her first day.  In fact, she told us at dinner that she loves kindergarten and can't wait to go back.  Let's just hope that mentality sticks!

Changing Schools

Change...it happens every day.  Some changes, however, are bigger than others.  This week we have a lot of change coming to our household.  On Friday, I took Audrey and Barrett to Downtown Children's Center for the last time.  This is the only school either of them has ever known.  Audrey departs with many of her preschool friends for kindergarten.  Barrett leaves behind a completely intact class for Kirkwood Early Childhood Center.  The reason for Audrey's move is obvious; she is a big kid now and gets to start elementary school!  For Barrett, we decided since Audrey is closer to home, he should be too, which will help tremendously when I am out of town and Billy is the sole transport. 

Because Barrett is so young, he doesn't really grasp what is happening.  We visited his new school and his new class last week for about an hour. He was very timid at first and wouldn't even walk into the room.  After playing in the room for a couple of minutes, we went to the playground, and he was in his element.  He hopped on a trike and started chasing around the other boys on their trikes.  He will be fine, no doubt.  That doesn't mean he won't put on the waterworks when I drop him off the first few days though.

Audrey, on the other hand, has more anxiety about the change.  We've also had a lot of build up.  It started with the open house in February, the initial orientation back in April, a parent orientation this week, and then a meet the teachers event for students the following night. Oh, and I can't forget to mention the "Welcome to Westchester" sign that appeared in our lawn last week. After we went to the school for meet the teachers, Audrey informed us that she didn't like kindergarten and didn't want to go.  When I asked why, she responded that she doesn't like math and they do math in kindergarten.  I tried to mention things she does like to do that are math related, but she had made up her mind and there was no changing it.  She has gotten excited about her backpack and lunch box, buying school supplies, and even practicing the 20 minute timed lunches.  On the other hand, within 24 hours of one of these events or just a detailed conversation about kindergarten, Audrey has a meltdown.  It is never specifically about these items; in fact, it is generally something trivial and unimportant (like me dropping her off at school), but that is how I know it isn't about the trigger of the meltdown.  She is worried about going to kindergarten. 

Honestly, I may not help matters, because I am anxious for her.  She doesn't know any other kids at her elementary school.  She also has always gone to DCC, knows the teachers, and knows the routines.  They also get only 20 minutes of "rest time" in kindergarten, and even yesterday she took a 2 hour nap.  In the end, I know she'll be fine, but the next week could be rather interesting while she adjusts to the new school, the new schedule, and the new expectations put on her as a kindergartener. It will also be an adjustment for the rest of us with new routines and schedules all around. 

They always say that change is good, and I know that this is all for the best.  Audrey is such a smart, kind, and strong girl that I know she'll quickly step up to make new friends.  She'll probably be trying to tell the class what to do by the end of the month.  Barrett is so happy and easy going that he will find his new groove in no time.  Mommy will come around too.  I've had my moments; two to be exact. And I anticipate at least one more on Tuesday morning.  It is truly bittersweet.  It warms my heart to see my children having new adventures and continuing their journey to adulthood.  It is also a taste, however, of when they'll be grown and mommy and daddy won't be the two most important people in their lives.