From Generation to Generation

I have always been interested in the social sciences.  Learning about people, what drives them, and how they relate to the world is fascinating to me.  I think that is what drew me to my major in college (advertising) and my current job (managing people).  Being a parent puts a whole new spin on this interest of mine, because I am now molding two people and teaching them how to relate to the world.  In that regard, I constantly find myself faced with generational differences.  Since my children's generation hasn't really been defined, and because the traits of generations are directly related to those of the parent generation, I have been reflecting on how the traits of my generation will shape the generation of my children.  I guess my hope is that this self-reflection will help me understand how my values, character and ultimately my behaviors will help shape who my children become. 

I have always thought I do a decent job of relating to different generations.  Traditionalists (or the silent generation) value morals, loyalty and integrity, all of which I strive to maintain, making me more conservative than most of my peers.  I can relate to the baby boomers work-hard-to-achieve-your-goals attitude.  I am not afraid to dig in and get my hands dirty, and I have always been told I am extremely independent.  I want to chart my own destiny.

I was born right on the cusp of Generations X and Y, so  I can relate to almost all of the characteristics of each. 

• I've been told I am both independent and resourceful (X). 
• I value flexibility and work/life balance.  I actually use the "work hard/play hard" mantra during my introductory meeting with any new members of my team at work (X). 
• I admittedly put my family first and greatly value my role as a wife/daughter/mother (Y). 
• I also like working in teams and am achievement oriented; I want to succeed, and I want to do it as a team, whether that be coworkers, friends, or family (Y). 
• I do a better job of achieving my goals when I am incentivized.  For example, if I finish all of the laundry before dinner, I'll make brownies for dessert (Y).
• To quote a study on generational characteristics the Everett College website, I "crave attention in the forms of feedback and guidance. [I] appreciate being kept in the loop and seek frequent praise and reassurance."

While I can relate to other generations, because I am so much a part of Generations X and Y, this sometimes puts me at odds with people from other generations.  The value I place on independence and flexibility is in direct conflict with the value traditionalists place on conformity and consistency.  My desire to find balance between my family and my career can be seen as a lack of commitment or work ethic by the hard-working career-focused boomers.

As I consider the characteristics of my generation and myself, I wonder how the children we raise will relate to the world.  They obviously will have technology ingrained in their existence.  How will social media impact their ability to relate to other people?  Will the constant flow of information cause them to be scatter brained or better at knowing how to focus and tune things out?  Will they even know what it is like to work in a cube in an office building? Will they ever win a first place prize trophy, or will they always get a trophy no matter where they rank?  

I ask these questions not because I expect to get answers.  I ask them because I think it is important to consider the world around us as I make decisions about how to let my children interact with that world.  At some point, I will have to decide if/when to allow my children get cell phones, Facebook accounts, and participate in activities outside of school.  In making those decisions, I will have to weigh my own values with those that the world promotes as "right." To be quite honest, my instinct is to shelter my children from those worldly influences as long as possible.  I realize that isn't the best approach, and I do not plan to do that.  I strive to find balance for myself and my children. 

Next week, we go to a kindergarten open house at Audrey's elementary school.  I know that has prompted much of my recent reflection on this generational topic.  I could stress myself out over trying to perfect the way I raise my children (and believe me, perfectionism is my tendency).  Instead, I'll entertain these questions from time to time to feed my interest in the social sciences, but I'll focus my time and energy on loving my children the way Christ loves me and teaching them to share that love with the people in their lives.  Whatever generational influences they have, I pray those influences won't get in the way of my children growing up to always know and serve their heavenly Father. 

Life Jackets Rock

Today at swimming lessons, both Audrey and Barrett's classes worked with life jackets.  I was in the pool with Barrett, and as soon as he saw the instructor with the life jacket, he started pointing and saying "that."  I could not get the life jacket on him fast enough.  All of the other toddlers were trying to get out of theirs and some were even screaming.  Barrett laid back with his head on the head pillow and chilled.  He was smiling the whole time.

The bigger kids have the life jackets without the head support.  As soon as Audrey had hers on, she decided she was ready for the deep end of the pool.  The teachers had to chase her down to keep her with the rest of the class.  When I asked her about it, her response was that she tried to sneak away.  I guess she is so comfortable in the water with her life jacket on that she was bored staying with the rest of the class.

All that said, the time we spend at the lakes during the summer drilling the importance of wearing life jackets into their heads has worked.  Even though I clearly want Audrey to listen to her teachers, it makes me very proud that my kids are so comfortable with their life jackets.  They truly are lake rats. 

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

The past two weeks have been a whirlwind of travel for me.  First to Kansas City, then to Birmingham, AL, and then several day-long meetings at work.   You might think that I just want to come home and go to bed.  Fortunately, since I've been away from my family so much, what I really want to do is spend quality time with them.  I can tell that everyone is glad to have me home, which is extremely uplifting.   I think Billy was just as glad to have me home as the kids, if not more.   With all of the bad weather two weeks ago, driving was a nightmare, and he was having to drive downtown to drop off and pick up the kids each day in the middle of his commute to and from Boeing. 

I have really appreciated Billy's support through this. It is always tough for a mother to leave her family for any period of time, but it is easier when I know I have a supportive husband who will make sure we all get through it just fine. I have enough of the mommy guilt as it is, so the last thing I want is to pile the wife guilt on top of it, and fortunately for me, Billy understands that. 

Naturally, all of this travel and the time away from my family has caused me to pause and consider if this is right; is it what God wants me to do? My devotional reading one day last week talked about how Christians frequently pray for God to show them what to do; it was timely for me.  I want to know what path to follow, because I genuinely want to choose the one that God has laid out for me.  I understand that may mean taking the harder path or the one that I would prefer to ignore.  I sincerely want to make decisions the way God would make them for me.  My devotional lesson, however, challenged even that most sincere and valid desire.  While God has plans for us (Jeremiah 29:11) and calls us to serve him in the world by our deeds (1 John 3:18), the Bible spends more time discussing who God wants us to be than it does on what he wants us to do. He wants us to be imitators and disciples of Christ (Ephesians 5:1), believers, love, fruitful, and the list goes on and on. The devotional said it very well, so I will quote Joan C. Webb in It's a Wonderful (Imperfect) Life. 

"Being doesn't mean we neglect action.  Doing flows naturally out of being.  We can learn to be first and then to do."

With all that I feel like I have to do (including travel for the good of my company and the program I support at work), I find this very reassuring.  I love my family, and I may not have time for all that I want to do. But I believe.  I love God, and I try to "be like Jesus to the least of these" to quote Audio Adrenaline.  So, as I look forward to a few weeks without any work travel, I can rest in the loving arms of God and my family, and be thankful that I am loved unconditionally. 

My flight from Birmingham got in late Wednesday night.  So, Thursday morning, Barrett heard me talking to Audrey and started saying "mommy, mommy" from his crib.  When I walked in his room, he greeted me with a huge grin and open arms.  It made my heart smile.  Audrey takes a little longer to warm up to me again, but by Thursday night both kids were happy to play and snuggle with mommy, and mommy was ecstatic to play and snuggle with them.  I relish those smiles and snuggles. I may not do all of the motherly things the "experts" tell me I should, but I am and will always be a loving mother and wife to my children and husband. 

The Great Snow Storm of 2014

I have a feeling that what we experienced last weekend will be talked about for years.  The weather experts are calling it Winter Storm Ion.  The past few years and even a few weeks ago, we have gotten a lot of rain or ice with a dusting of snow.  This time, however, it was all snow.  That is approximately 10 inches of snow fell last Sunday.  To top that off, there are record low temperatures and crazy strong winds.  When we woke up Monday morning it was -10 degrees with wind chills around -25.  The high Monday was -2 degrees.  Needless to say, the kids daycare was closed and Billy and I worked from home that day.
 

The unfortunate part about the temperatures is that we couldn't get the kids out to enjoy the snow.  Audrey wanted to go sledding so badly too.  I might have consider it except that Barrett was diagnosed with an ear infection last Saturday morning, and since he is already on antibiotics, I figure we need to focus on keeping everyone warm and healty.  So, instead of building snow people and sledding while we were snowed in Sunday and Monday, we built lego masterpieces, played in the castle tent, watched movies, and just acted silly. By Tuesday, we were all getting a little cabin fever and were ready to get out of the house.  I left for Kansas City Tuesday and just got back yesterday, so I was glad for the time at home with my children.  Here are some photographic highlights of how we endured the storm and fought of cabin fever.

Our First Year on Harwood

Today marks the one year anniversary of when we officially moved into our home.  I was looking at pictures with Audrey the other night, and came across the photos that we took of the house when we first closed, before we had moved in or even painted.  It is amazing what a difference a little bit of paint and furniture can do to liven up a place.  Those photos inspired me to do a little before and after comparison.  It definitely feels like home now, even in the freezing cold snow.