7 Years Old

Seven years.  That's right bubby...it's been seven years since you greeted us on that quiet, sunny, Sunday morning in May. From the moment I first felt you move inside of me, I knew you were special, but you've only proven that more and more each day. You're kind, goofy, and have a keen sense of loyalty and integrity. You really notice when things aren't fair or if they don't have a sound rationale. It often drives me crazy, especially when the irrational item at hand is a request I made to you (like cleaning up toys 5 minutes earlier than normal because I am tired and want to go to bed 5 minutes earlier than normal). But, it is clear that you're growing into a rational, independent thinker, for which I have a lot of respect and appreciation.

You love playing sports.  I think it's a combination of the competition, the physical outlet, and the time you get to spend with your friends. Even when you're done with the game, whatever it is, you are still running around playing tag, wrestling, or making silly jokes with your friends. I think you also like the trophies that you get for participation. You do have them all lined up on your dresser. You have started asking to watch baseball on TV though, and your and I don't quite know what to do about it. We don't particularly like watching it, and neither does your sister, but I guess it's alright from time to time.

You especially love hockey. I know you like playing other sports too, but hockey is the one that you seem to get the most excited about. I often wonder if that's just because you know your dad likes it so much, but whatever the reason, you are just about the only kid that I never see getting tired and wanting to be done with your practices or games. You always want to stay on the ice longer. You also like playing goalie, and not just because you don't have to skate as much. You really do watch the puck and do a decent job of stopping it. You usually don't play goalie, but I just love this picture because you look so fierce.

You've found some new hobbies over the past year and really started to develop some quirky interests...like making paper airplanes. You make them all the time, and are even kind enough to make them for your brother, and he asks for them a lot, because he is quick to ruin the ones you make him. But, you are so patient with him, despite his toddler-ness.You also have started reading more, especially comic books and graphic novels. You love all of the Dogman books. You also still love legos. This year was the first year you got to participate in Lego league, and you loved it. You also are really into watches, love listening to music on your "ipod" and love remote control anything. It cracks me up how into those sorts of things you are. One day, you tried taping 2 of your drones to a box to get it to fly. It didn't work...the drones were too small for the size of the box, but I have to give you credit for a solid effort!

You do love your brother, and the two of you play like I expect most brothers do. There are usually some sort of masks involved, with one of you obviously being the bad guy. Fletcher makes a lot of "pew pew" noises, because Star Wars is his favorite, and you often resort to some mix of kung foo and break dancing to foil your opponent. I do love watching the two of you play together. I hope that the bond you're forming as brothers only grows stronger as you get older.

And, one of my favorite things to watch is how you dance. You dance with complete abandon. You love it, and you don't care what everyone around you thinks about your dancing. You just do it because you want to. You still love Michael Jackson, Justin Timberlake, and now Maroon 5 too. Dad and I have also gotten some classic rock and alt rock influence in there too, but deep down, I think you prefer the upbeat pop style music.

You may have noticed that some of these pictures are sort of random.  Well, that is because you don't really like to get your picture taken these days...unless it's a selfie.  But, if we're taking a selfie, then you're little brother wants in. And then, every once in a while, your dad inadvertently photobombs them. You do have a pretty great smile though :)

I am so excited to celebrate this 7th birthday with you. It's extra special this year for a few reasons. Not only is it Memorial Day, but we will also be at the Lake...AND, the Blues play game 1 of the Stanley Cup finals for the first time in 49 years. The only question is whether this birthday will be more memorable than the almost tornado on your 5th birthday down at the lake. Let's hope the only storm is the one the Blues stir up beating the Bruins!

Happy Birthday Barrett! I love you so much and am so grateful for the joy you bring to our lives.

Leaning On God

After Billy got home from Seattle, I had help, and I relaxed.  I stopped having to hold it all together, because I had my partner back.  Ironically, what is found is that I started leaning on him instead of leaning on God.  It took me a bit to realize that, but where I had so much more grace and patience for myself and my kids while Billy was gone, once he got back, I got crabby again. I almost feel like I was a better person when he was gone because I HAD to lean on God. With Billy back, I started trying to take it all on myself again.

I am still working through this and trying to sort out how to always be leaning toward God instead of relying on my own strength, ability and understanding. I can think of many examples in the past week where I didn't even come close to doing that, but I won't bore you with all of the minute details. Suffice to say, I have higher expectations when my husband is home than when he's not, so I give less grace and lose my temper more quickly. And the worst part is that it's silly little stuff...stuff that in the grand scheme of things doesn't really matter. The dog chewing on a rug, the kids tracking mud all over the white carpet, or my kids talking back to me instead of doing what I ask. Yet, I let it completely hijack my ability to think, breath or function until I've made a food of myself.

So, what to do? Honestly, I don't have it figured out. But, I guess that's actually perfect, because it gives me a chance to get some practice leaning into God for support. That means starting with prayer and reading scripture.  To start, the verse of the day today seemed very fitting, so I'll share it here.

"Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Come near to God and he will come near to you." James 4:7-8

We'll see where God takes me on this journey as I continue to learn to give up control to God.